Five Most Common Myths about the Divorce Process

Any way you spin it, getting a divorce is usually an extremely unpleasant experience. Assets are divided; kids are shared; blame and heartbreak permeate the circumstances. However, there may be light at the end of the tunnel for you and your spouse. Many worst-case scenarios apply to very few people. In fact, after brushing up on your research and learning how to file for divorce in Illinois, you may find that your divorce might end up being much better than what you thought. False information often causes anxiety about the divorce process as well. With that in mind, here are the 5 most common myths about the divorce process.

You Have to Have a Lawyer

Many assume you have to have a lawyer for a divorce. However, if you and your spouse can agree to the terms of your divorce (i.e. division of assets, child support, maintenance, and custody schedules) and qualify for an uncontested divorce, you won’t have to have a lawyer at all. Simply fill out the forms and provide the proofs where necessary.

Divorce Is Always Expensive

The main cost of expensive divorces comes from court and attorney fees. With an uncontested divorce, you and your spouse will be skipping these expensive steps and filing for divorce on your own. Even your division of assets doesn’t have to hurt too much if you and your spouse agree on the assets and the amounts.

Adultery Means Lost Assets

Many assume that if one party in the marriage commits adultery, they receive no assets in the settlement. Typically, this is not true. Other signs of irresponsibility, usually financial, must be present along with adultery to merit a full loss of assets. In addition, many divorces involve more than one unfaithful party, rendering this assumption invalid.

The Mother Always Gets the Kids

Another common myth is that the mother always receives custody of the kids. While this may have been true in earlier times in certain states, today the mother only receives custody of the kids if she is deemed a more suitable parent for the children. Scenarios where kids are placed in a terrible situation because of an unfair rule simply are not true.

Men Never Get Maintenance

Maintenance, or “alimony,” is often thought to only be paid by men to their ex-wives. While this is often the case, maintenance simply flows from the spouse with more income to that with less, particularly if one spouse is unable to support himself or herself alone. Child custody also plays a key role in this.


Divorce doesn’t have to be as bad as you’ve heard. With a little understanding with your spouse, a little bit of compromise, and a spirit to resolve the conflict quickly and without fighting, you can have a simple, inexpensive, attorney-free divorce in Illinois by simply filling out a few forms.